Sad WOMEN

How do I describe a woman who's sad? Why and what is it that makes an average woman feel sad, hopeless, depressed, upset and plain unhappy. Of course I am talking in general, I am not professing facts; merely putting my thoughts on what I believe tear women apart and feel shattered. Being a woman, whose had her share of griefs, and who has spent a better part of life trying to fathom the mysteries of 'emotions', feelings and human realtionships, rather, the fragility of them, it seems appropriate that I take a pause, I stop a while, I sit down, and ponder on what was it that drove me to despair; what is it that affects women who are my closest of friends, my sisters and now younger women that I am fortunate enough to know deeply.

Women I believe are torn apart by the following circumstances. Again this is no checklist, it is what I feel universally break women, for we are made a certain way. A bit of explanation is required here, when I say "sad" I mean despairling hopeless, depressed for a longer than usual period of time (not due to physiological reason).

First and foremost is disappoinment in Love or a Loved one. (Since I am going in sequence of life) Women in every part of the world experience emotional melt-downs much more than men if they are jilted, cheated upon, betrayed in personal and close realtionships. I don't at any time mean to denigrate the feelings of men, but as women, especially in our part of the world define themselves in reference to their 'family' and close relations more so than men, its breaking up has far reaching impact on them. There are other societal factors that come to play here as well, but by and large in my personal experience I have seen women take an argument with her spouse or lover, a skirmish with her children, an upset with a sibling with far greater import as compared to men.

Then there is an acknowledgemnet, the dawning, the revelation at some point in their lives that they could have done much more than they have accomplished so far, that they are capable of more than they themselves gave credit for. There is an instant sense of not reaching their actual potential in one aspect of their life or another. If a woman is successful in her career she would feel sad at having neglected her family at one time or another, if a woman is happy at being a home maker, there would certainly come a time when she encounters feelings of despair of having 'not given time to things that mattered to her own person'. Repeatedly I see women facing these turmoils, and I wonder what it is that we actually want?

The resentment which most women have against their husbands. Now, I would argue that most women, even the ones who are content in their relationship with their husbands nurse a deep seated, silent, and repressed anger against them. I don't know if men become different when they assume the role of a care-taker or a responsible husband, but time and again I find women complaining of their husbands on various counts; they could be resentful because they feel 'left-out' of the mainstream life of the husband, or on count of the man being too unemotional and reticent.

Women, around me, are not content and happy with their lot, with themselves, with others around them and with their lives. I feel, we women need to do some soul searching and find what it is that make us truly happy; and then go for it.