U know you have the Mad Cow Disease

if u have to spend hours a day mowing, err excuse me, eating grass
if u want to argue, fight, shout and scream at everyone who has the misfortune of talking to you
you'r not only fat and ugly, you'r totally unpleasant in a so not cute way!
bulls hate you, and run for safety at the sight of you
humans want to dump you left, right and center
you'r just meat and that too rotten!!
you rant and rave and no one's listening
you think you'r smart when actually you are certified insane
you are totally unpredictable
you are uber paranoid
you hate every living thing within sight
you suddenly start identifying with the hundreds of other mad cows roaming around thinking they are of 'sound' mind
you have black hair but u want it to be blond and all shades of it
you need yards and yards of cloth to make one shirt!!!!
certainly, if you need more than one seat to sit your ass!
when you look like one!
when they stop making bras to fit your size!!!
when you turn a vegetarian
when you want to kick every man in the butt
you want to be left alone
people around you only order fish
your erstwhile owners suddenly want to kill you
you start to look dangerous
and you get hysterical
when medicines given to relax you have the very opposite effect
when every man in sight seems like a butcher with an axe in hand!!!!
if you become something of a sensation overnight
when you moo a lot! and that too for no reason at all